You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Randomize
