dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
Randomize
