I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
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I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
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