Fine. I'll sleep in my office
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
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