Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
Randomize
