from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
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