i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize