your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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