We named our party play list daddy issues
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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