She announced her abortion via fbk
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
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