Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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