just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
