At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
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