omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
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