He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Randomize
