whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
i already hear my dad disowning me
When my options for Friday night are being a 3rd wheel or bringing a gay man as my date i need to focus on other things in life like having a successful career.
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
You made out with two different species that night
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Randomize
