Who did Billy Mays play for?
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize