YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Randomize
