i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
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