let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
you never un-have a 4some
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
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