he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Even the bartender felt bad for me
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
