I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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