It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
Of course I have a pirate flag
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
Randomize