i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
