That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Randomize
