I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
You ruined the universe
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
Randomize
