well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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