I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
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