She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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