We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
Randomize