I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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