Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
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I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
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