She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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