He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
sex in a hospital.. check
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
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