woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
