she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize