return my video game
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Randomize
