: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I can't open my eyes
Lol why not?
Because I have fat ankles and I'm drunk
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize