you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
You are a genius and a whore.
Randomize