Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Randomize