Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
they call him Oral-B. enough said
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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