Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Randomize