You're completely useless in the revolution.
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Randomize