I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
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I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
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with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive