awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
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