How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
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I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
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Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
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