ya dads aren't the best wingmen
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Iβm on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
Good news!! I can adult!! π turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ππ
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize