piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
Randomize
