How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
Had dinner with a married woman but didn't have sex with her. Tweeted at Mike Pence to apologize anyway.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
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