Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize
