Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Randomize
