I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
My bed is full of blood and feathers
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
Randomize